From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane.

life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; It's about learning to dance in the rain.

In Search Of Symmetry – Day 23 Breast Reconstruction


My day began with my angel.  Angie volunteered to help me when I called the church and asked for help.   The church we attend  has 1200 to 1400 people in a service, you have to call and ask for help.  It is not possible for anyone to just know you are going in for surgery and need help.   Angie and I had never met until she came over to  help me.  She came when I still had 4 JP drains.  She emptied my JP  drains, and helped me shower.   She is a blessing and has blessed me tremendously. Now I have no JP drains and I shower myself.   Together we walked my 3 miles today, then we ate lunch, had coffee at Starbucks and she drove me to the lab to have my blood drawn for my thyroid test. 

Gary worked his last night shift.  In September last year, he was asked to work the night shift.  My husband is not a night person.  He is an early morning person.  Sleeping during the day is very difficult for him.  My bed never got made up.  This was very difficult for me!  Prior to my surgery, on the weekends the girls and I would go shopping, go to the park or to the movies so Gary could sleep.  Even little noises would wake him up.  May 2  he begins his new job and although it will involve some travel away from home, it will be a day job.  Prayers are answered!

Transition is happening.  Two days in a row I went to places, beside the doctor.  Gary leaves the night shift.  God is good all the time,  and his mercies never fail.  If you, dear reader are waiting for something to happen, do not despair, God hears your prayer.  I am agreeing with you, that it will happen.  Sometimes the wait is to prepare our heart for the blessing God has for us.  Sometimes we do not know why we wait.  God is faithful.  Do not despair.

And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.  Galatians 6:9  Amplified

I also pray for all the fathers working the night shift.  Today I read a post by a young mother whose husband is working the night shift and she expressed my sentiments exactly.  You can read the post here, http://tumbledweeds.wordpress.com/2011/04/21/holding-pattern/

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 22 Breast Reconstruction


I wore clothes today!  And make-up and earrings.  I went to the grocery store with Gary and visited my neighbors.  This is the first time I have been out,  except to go to the doctor since my surgery.  Getting dressed and wearing make-up cheered me up and I began to really feel there might be an end to this at some point.

My hair has grown out from the chemo to about three inches all over my head.  It is still thin, cottony and grey, but with a little mousse and blow drying I can coax an actual hair style out of it.  Many times I feel silly about being so vain.  It is much easier not to worry about what you look like, when you do not have to put any effort into it.

  You who sit down in the High God’s presence, spend the night in Shaddai’s shadow,
   Say this: “God, you’re my refuge.
      I trust in you and I’m safe!”
   That’s right—he rescues you from hidden traps,
      shields you from deadly hazards.
   His huge outstretched arms protect you—
      under them you’re perfectly safe;
      his arms fend off all harm.
   Fear nothing—not wild wolves in the night,
      not flying arrows in the day,
   Not disease that prowls through the darkness,
      not disaster that erupts at high noon.
   Even though others succumb all around,
      drop like flies right and left,
      no harm will even graze youPsalm 91:1-4

A phone call can change everything.  I received a phone call today,  and my entire flood situation was resolved.  It is much easier to rejoice when the prayer is answered than when you are waiting on the answer.  Focusing on blessings changed my situation and it will change yours.  If you can change your focus from the problem to your blessings, your situation will change.  Many times it takes longer than 24 hours.  I praise the Lord that my situation was resolved in such a short time frame. 

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 21 Breast Reconstruction


I really do not like it when people do not do what they say they will do.  Unmet Expectations.  The fact that I am housebound, full of stitches, itchy and sore, increases the stress of unmet expectations.  I am trying to stay calm and not panic.  The wet floor is still in my bedroom.  Nothing has happened and the  insurance “adjuster” went on vacation, with this message,” I know more about your claim than anyone else, leave me a message and when I get back from vacation, I will get back with you.”  Wonderful!

It could be I am irritable, because of the storm watch.  We have already had hail and rain.  We are still under a tornado watch for another hour. 

It is because of the Lord’s mercy and loving-kindness that we are not consumed, because His tender compassions fail not.

 They are new every morning; great and abundant is Your stability and faithfulness.

The Lord is my portion or share, says my living being, my inner self; therefore will I hope in Him and wait expectantly for Him.  Lamentations 3:23    Amplified

One of my Dad’s favorite songs was “Count your Blessings”.   It is so much easier to focus on unmet expectations, storms, hail, rain and tornadoes; than my blessings.  Gary starts his new job on May 2.  This is something we prayed and believed for, for almost a year.  I have my beautiful Honda Insight hybrid, which we bought in January, right before gas went through the roof.  My Honda Insight hybrid is a double blessing, as it gets that great hybrid gas mileage.  I am healing great, I have had no problems, besides a rash.   The doctor says I am a model patient.  So many people have prayed for me.  I am so blessed to have the prayer and support of so many people.

I encourage you, dear reader, to write down your irritations, problems and unmet expectations and let them go – and begin to count your blessings.  On another piece of paper write down your blessings and focus on those.  An attitude of gratitude is far more productive, than stress and anxiety.  

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 20 Breast Reconstruction


My daughter said tonight that she would be so glad when I was back.  I did not know I went anywhere.  I was sitting in front of her, at the bar in the kitchen.  She said, “You know what I mean, back doing things.” 

Last Friday my daughter and Haruka went to the Big Band Dance at school.  The girls had been invited by two friends of theirs, boys.  It was the first time my daughter had gone to a dance as a couple.  A friend from church took them shopping on Thursday afternoon.  Friday, when my daughter was coming home from school, she burst into tears.  She berated my husband for not “caring”.  I know that she was missing her mommy.  If I had been up to it, I would have taken her to have her nails done on Thursday.  We would have gone  shopping on Tuesday and I would have taken her to have her hair done on Friday.  As it was, she did not get her hair or nails done. She did go shopping. 

It is hard to watch my family function without me.  My husband worked from 9:00 p. m. last night until 11:00 a. m. this morning.  He came home, ate and went to bed by 11:45 a. m.   Fortunately, someone from church picked up the girls at 2:45 p. m. so he was able to sleep until 5:30 p.m.  He got up and took our daughter to swim practice, shopped for groceries while she was swimming, picked her up from swim practice and came home and fixed supper.  This was his second night shift and he just left for work, another 12 to 14 hour shift tonight.  I sit here in my yoga pants and t-shirt and watch all this happen around me.  That is very hard.  I have at least two more weeks.

More than the soreness, the stiffness and the itchiness, is the fact that I am here, but I am not available. 

God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry, our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love.

 We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first.                                                                                                                                                            1 John 4 18-19   The Message

Practicing perfect love, without fear.  I am praying for that.  The next two weeks, I am going to practice everyday – love, without fear.  Love for the insurance company, medical and homeowners.  Love for my family.  Love for myself and love for every person who put themselves in my path.  I will not be afraid about our financial situation, our flood, my family and myself. 

Dear reader, I pray for perfect love for you.  I pray that you will join me in putting  away fear.  What do you fear.  I cherish comments.

I believe every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!!  Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it.  Join me for free and let us see what will happen.  I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of  A Hurricane with your friends.  Subscribe today!  It is free.  It is easy.  You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success.  Your email address will be kept private.  You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search of Symmetry – Day 19 Breast Reconstruction


Some days you cannot put on your happy face, no matter how you try.  Yesterday was one of those days for me.  Although I tried several times to write a post, it came out so dreary and full of whining and self-pity that I coul not publish it.  With all that whine, I certainly needed cheese and crackers.  The next thing up was to become the dreaded “crap magnet”!  https://mommemau2.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/hello-world/

This morning I realized that there were two reasons for my long face, and bad attitude.  The first, is that my son and his family had planned to come from San Antonio this weekend and spend the weekend with us.  As my husband begins his new job on May 2 and his last day at his current employment is this Thursday, he was asked to work all weekend.  My son and his family changed their plans and will be coming two weeks from now.  I was really looking forward to seeing them.  The second reason as the doctor still does not want me to wear clothes, so another Sunday without church.  Casual is one thing, but going to church in only yoga pants and a big t-shirt seems very inappropriate to someone raised in the Church of Christ. 

I have not taken any pain medications in two days.  I really do not like to take medications.  I am not in pain, just sore, itchy and stiff.  This also might have attributed to my bad attitude.

The flood saga continues.  I am not sure how to proceed.  I am praying for supernatural wisdom.  I request your prayers.

God, you’ve done it all!
      Who is quite like you?
   You, who made me stare trouble in the face,
      Turn me around;
   Now let me look life in the face.
      I’ve been to the bottom;
   Bring me up, streaming with honors;   Psalms 71:21 The Message

This is all in the Lord’s plan.  I pray for peace in the storm.  I know that He has not brought me this far to “let me drown” as the old song goes.  I am blessed beyond measure, I am cancer free.  I have two breasts!  I have a husband and family that loves me.  We have insurance, medical and homeowners.  I have a new car!  Well, it was brand new in January.  I have a church family that has helped me with taking the girls back and forth to school, cooked us meals and prayed for us.  I am blessed.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 17 Breast Reconstruction.


I led a liturgical dance team for 8 years.  Dancing is my passion.  I collect anything that has to do with dance.  There has not been much opportunity for dancing over the last 2 years.  This morning a friend of mine sent me a poem by a young girl who is dying of cancer.  It is called “Slow Dance.”   Enchanted by the title, I read it with tears running down my face.  The young girl who wrote it requested that the poem be shared.  I am sharing it with you.

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever 
watched 
kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to 
the 
rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a 
butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the 
fading 
night?
You better slow down.

Don’t 
dance so 
fast.
Time is short.
The music 
won’t 
last.

Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear 
the 
reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie 
in your 
bed
With the next hundred chores 
Running through 
your head?
You’d better 
slow down
Don’t dance so 
fast.
Time is 
short.
The music won’t 
last.

Ever told your 
child, 
We’ll do it 
tomorrow?
And in your 
haste,
Not see 
his
sorrow?
Ever lost 
touch,
Let a good 
friendship die 
Cause you 
never had time 
To call 
and say,’Hi’
You’d 
better slow down.

Don’t dance 
so fast.
Time 
is short.
The music won’t 
last..

When you run 
so fast to get somewhere
You 
miss half the fun of getting 
there.
When you worry and hurry 
through your 
day,
It is like an unopened 
gift….
Thrown 
away.
Life is not a 
race.
Do take it 
slower
Hear the 
music
Before the song is 
over.

I think that says it all.  I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.  The young girl asked that her poem be shared with as many people as possible.  Please share with all your friends.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 16 Breast Reconstruction


Dr. Saint Cyr called me in, he wanted to see me today between surgeries. Gary and I drove over to his office in Dallas from Fort Worth this afternoon.  As usual the traffic was obscene.  I am trying to learn to relax in terrible traffic, but after 4 years in Nebraska – it is hard. 

My belly button stitches are out!  Both my JP drains are out and I can stand up straight.  Dr. Saint Cyr scheduled me to see him again in two weeks.  I still cannot lift anything or wear clothes, besides yoga pants and big t-shirts.  Progress is being made.  Dr. Saint Cyr indicated he would more than likely approve street clothing and maybe, maybe driving when I see him in two weeks.

The flood situation is on hold, until Monday.  More moisture remediation must be done.  One third of the floor in the bedroom must be removed, including the plywood underlayment.  Something was said about bringing fans in,again.  It is all OK.  https://mommemau2.wordpress.com/2010/09/23/whatever-the-name-of-your-hurricane-its-ok/

Giving thanks always for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father. 

                                                                                                                       Ephesians 5:20 New American Standard

Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

                                                                                                                      I Thessalonians 5:18 New Living Version

I am so thankful to be able to walk completely upright, tall and straight.  I am so thankful for my very flat stomach.  I am so thankful and grateful to be symmetrical, with two breasts.  I am so thankful we have insurance that will pay for the repairs.  I am so thankful for friends and family who have prayed and  believed with me for my healing.  I am so thankful for friends, neighbors  and church family that have stepped into the gap here in Fort Worth and helped with taking the girls to school and other places and provided meals.  I am so thankful that I know my Lord Jesus Christ as my personal friend and He has held my hand every step of the way.

Dear reader, if you do not know my Lord Jesus Christ, I pray that you will seek until you find Him.  I am praying for you to find Him.    

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search of Symmetry – Day 15 Breast Reconstruction


I skipped a day!  The computer was down, either from the bad storm,or all the people coming and going from “the flood.”  I am not sure which.  It required another person,the repairman from AT&T to come by and do whatever magic they do for us to have internet and television again. 

The water remediation specialists came to remove the water from the wood floors in our bedroom, moving  us to the third bedroom.  They filled our bedroom and bath up with noisy, hot and dirty equipment.  After it had run for 24 hours, my daughter informed me the electric extension cords run under her door to the equipment were gouging holes in her wood floor. Wonderful!  I later went into our bathroom and the carpet was soaking wet.  When the technician came to check on the equipment, he found that the equipment pulling moisture from the wood floor had sprung a leak.  Now we are down to bare concrete in the  bathroom. 

I am still toddling around  the house with 2 JP drains.

So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose? If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen? Who would dare even to point a finger? The One who died for us—who was raised to life for us!—is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture.  Romans 8: 31-39  The Message

Let me count my blessings.  Today was my beloved husband’s birthday.  He is my strong man and my hero.  He has had faith for my healing, from the beginning.  He has never doubted that I will be better than ever, after this walk with the Lord.  What a tremendous blessing it is to have a partner who is so faithful.  Even now, in my Monster High body – with a sewed on belly button, he sees me well and whole. 

For  a long time  it had seemed to me that life was about to begin – real life.  But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be got through, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid.  Then life would begin.  At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.   Alfred D”Souza   

Today, just like yesterday, I choose to smile.   To know that today is the first day of the rest of my life.  I must live today in joy.  Knowing that God has a plan and His plan is for my good.     Dear reader, God has a plan for your life and His plan is for your good.  Smile and rejoice, for today is the first day of the rest of your life.

I pray health and wholeness, wealth and prosperity for each and every reader.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 13 Breast Reconstruction


 THINGS THAT MAKE ME SMILE!

A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones.  Proverbs 17:22   Amplified

Things that kids say – http://www.maidinaustralia.com/2011/04/beware-skanks.html

Baby Animals – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCKfYqjnMoY&feature=player_embedded

Silly Videos – http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=361177129776

Friends that pray for me.

Get Well Cards.

Flowers.

My Garden.

My Family.

My Lord.

Starbucks Latte

Comments on my posts.

I hope  I made you smile.  I can focus on my flood, my itchy pain and my current finances after paying TWO very large deductibles, one for the surgery and one for the flood, or I can smile.  I choose to SMILE.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

  

  

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 12 Breast Reconstruction


 I began walking again today.  Gary walked with me for one half mile and the girls walked with me 3 miles.  This is the exercise suggested by Dr. Saint Cyr when I asked for a referral to a physical therapist.  It really felt good out walking on the walking trails, even though I am still wearing  yoga pants and a t-shirt and have 2 JP drains.   Dr. Saint Cyr cautioned me several times not to stand up straight.  I am sure I looked quite silly.

Looking silly is one of the consequences of cancer. Shortly before I began cancer treatment, I went to a program put on by the American Cancer Society for breast cancer patients.  It is called “Looking Pretty”.  I was given a bag of makeup, a wig and some instructions on how to draw on eyebrows.  A prior participant was lauded because she never left her room with out her wig and full makeup.  This somehow made her feel normal. 

I hated my wigs. They were hot and itchy.  I never have been able to draw on eyebrows.  There have been many days when I have not worn makeup.  I noticed I have never been asked to speak at one of these events.  I have not felt “normal”since I began chemo.  I have read accounts of woman in the 16th and 17th century who survived smallpox.  Smallpox was very disfiguring and it was common to coat your face with wax, or to past little scraps of velvet over the worst smallpox scars.  Coating the face with wax is where we get the expression about cracking a smile.  A smile would literally cause the wax to crack and fall off.  Before the surgery, I felt more in the category of a smallpox survivor, than “pretty”. 

What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.  Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. 1 Peter 3:4-5 The Message

I praise the Lord that he looks not on our appearance, but sees our heart.  Tomorrow I will not be in church, as I do not want to go to church in my yoga pants, t-shirt and with my JP drains, but my heart will be at the house of the Lord.  

I am praying blessings on everyone who has prayed for me.  I know the many prayers have sustained me.      

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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