From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane.

life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; It's about learning to dance in the rain.

In Search of Symmetry – Day 30 Breast Reconstruction


A friend had an interesting status on Facebook.  It was, in honor of the royal wedding on Friday, use your royal wedding guest name. Start with either Lord or Lady. Your first name is one of your grandparents’ names. Your surname will be the name of your pet, double-barreled with the name of a street you’ve lived on.   These are the names posted so far:

  • Lady Thelma Santiago the 6th (that’s me)
  • Lady Aquilla Coco of Coleridge (this is a very good friend and today is her anniversary – #32)
  •  Lady Rose Marie Stanley of Lincolnshire
  •  Princess Maddie Boone of Harmon
  •  Lady Laura Smokey of Artemis (that is my sister, I remember Artemis Street)

Play along, leave your royal wedding guest name in the comments!

My neighbor volunteered to be my walking buddy today, so I did get my 3 miles in.  3 miles with a walking buddy go fast and by yourself go very, very slow.  I want to thank all the people who have come to my assistance, helped me shower, emptied my JP drains, made meals for me and my family.  I have been so blessed. 

It’s better to have a partner than go it alone.
   Share the work, share the wealth.
   And if one falls down, the other helps,
   But if there’s no one to help, tough! 

  Two in a bed warm each other.
   Alone, you shiver all night. 

  By yourself you’re unprotected.
   With a friend you can face the worst.
   Can you round up a third?
   A three-stranded rope isn’t easily snapped.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-12  The Message 

I love this scripture and so does my husband.  In fact it is our scripture.  We put it on our invitations for our 15th wedding anniversary celebration and we will put it on our invitations for our 40th wedding anniversary celebration.  So I thought I would share it with you. I have 3 years and 8 months to plan that celebration!

Relationships are so important.  Do not wait for other people to reach out, you reach out.  Reach out to someone today.  If you are rebuffed, do not take offense, reach out to someone else tomorrow.  I pray for you dear reader, to begin deep and lasting relationships.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

 

 

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In Search Of Symmetry Day 29 – Breast Reconstruction


Do you have a house elf?  We have a house elf, he only wears one sock at a time.  Sometimes it seems he works overtime, there are so many things that happen at our house that “nobody did.”  Like  a broken cup, a load of laundry that was washed and not dried!  And of course, the “flood”, the waterfall in our wall. 

I am down to bare concrete in the master bath, one-third of the master bedroom is bare concrete.   Until today I had a big hole in the wall in the master bedroom, where the plumbing leak was repaired.  Sheetrock was put up and mudded today.  Friday, movers come to move us out of the house so that Monday the wood floors can be repaired and refinished.  It will take a week.  We will be in a hotel. 

I will say of the Lord, He is my Refuge and my Fortress, my God; on Him I lean and rely, and in Him I confidently trust! Psalms 91:2  Amplified

We are blessed, as this is covered by our homeowner’s insurance.  This would not be the time I would pick for a major reconstruction project on our house as it coincides with my breast reconstruction.  Friday I will see Dr.  Saint Cyr and I am hoping he will release me to wear street clothes and drive. 

I am praying for  you, dear reader,that you know my Lord in a powerful way.  You to come to know Him as a refuge and you can fully trust Him, always.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search of Symmetry – Day 28 Breast Reconstruction


Dr. Susan, the PA at my oncologist office called today.  She called to let me know that she had called in my thyroid prescription.  She asked me how the DIEP flap surgery was and was it what I expected.  For just one minute I felt the terror I had felt when I woke up in ICU, in incredible pain and hooked up to many, many machines.  I begged everyone in the room to put me back to sleep.  The next time I woke up, I was still in ICU, hooked up to many machines, including a catheter, but the pain was bearable.  It might have been the morphine pump!  I was so thirsty, my nurse would only give me ice chips.  I had my own nurse.  I was in ICU for 3 days. 

Doppler is more than radar, it is also how  the baby heartbeats were checked on  my new breast.  At first the Doppler heartbeats were checked every hour, then every two hours, then every four hours.  These heartbeats are checked where the blood supply to the new breast is attached by microsurgery to the chest wall.  Dr. Saint Cyr is my hero and my new breast is worth all the trauma.

The picture above is what I traded for a breast!  Thank you, Dr. Saint Cyr, it was an excellent trade.

The first surgery is all about getting the stomach tissue to live as a breast.  I was presently surprised to see a breast shape.  There is no nipple.  All the pretty parts come in the second and third surgeries, which are much shorter.  These surgeries are outpatient surgeries.   

    Even when the way goes through
      Death Valley,
   I’m not afraid
      when you walk at my side.
   Your trusty shepherd’s crook
      makes me feel secure. 

  You serve me a six-course dinner
      right in front of my enemies.
   You revive my drooping head;
      my cup brims with blessing. 

  Your beauty and love chase after me
      every day of my life.
   I’m back home in the house of God
      for the rest of my life    Psalm 23:4-6  The Message

When I woke the first time in pain and terror, all I could think of was “put me back to sleep!”  The rest of my time in the hospital, six days, I felt perfect peace that my breast would live and everything was OK.  I could feel the prayers that were prayed for me, covering me.  I pray for you, dear reader, to feel that perfect peace in whatever storm or terror you may encounter.  I am praying for you.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

 

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 27 Breast Reconstruction


Waiting for major surgery to heal is like waiting for paint to dry, it just goes on and on and on.   My t-shirt and yoga pant wardrobe is wearing thin.  My help is wearing out and meals from friends, family and church have trickled to zero.  Fortunately,  Gary is off from work this week as he will start his new job on May 2.  Friday I go to the doctor, and the doctor has indicated that he will release me to wear clothes and  DRIVE. 

 As for the rest of you, dear brothers and sisters, never get tired of doing good.  2 Thessalonians 3:13 NLT

I did not write anything on Good Friday,Saturday and Easter Sunday.  My intentions were to spend this weekend in pray and meditating on the sacrifice that My Lord made for me.  My good intentions were mostly sidetracked, but I did go to church on Sunday,in clothes. 

I pray that you had a blessed and wonderful Easter week. Although our finances were limited from the two deductibles we paid, the  surgery and the flood,   we had a blessed and wonderful Easter.  My 16 year old daughter requested a kitten for Easter.  We found the cutest white kitten on Craigslist.  

I love Craigslist, eBay and Facebook.  I am always warned about the evils of Craigslist – I sold my ten year old Suzuki in 24 hours for cash on Craigslist.  I have purchased and sold on eBay and had 2 bad transactions out of 357.  I have been able to make new friends, keep old friends and keep up with my family on Facebook.  I think it is all in your attitude?

I am praying for the grace to keep a good attitude as I wait for this surgery to heal.  Even my belly button is sewed on!  I know it will be worth it, at the end.  My dear reader, I pray for you to have grace to keep doing good, also.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 23 Breast Reconstruction


My day began with my angel.  Angie volunteered to help me when I called the church and asked for help.   The church we attend  has 1200 to 1400 people in a service, you have to call and ask for help.  It is not possible for anyone to just know you are going in for surgery and need help.   Angie and I had never met until she came over to  help me.  She came when I still had 4 JP drains.  She emptied my JP  drains, and helped me shower.   She is a blessing and has blessed me tremendously. Now I have no JP drains and I shower myself.   Together we walked my 3 miles today, then we ate lunch, had coffee at Starbucks and she drove me to the lab to have my blood drawn for my thyroid test. 

Gary worked his last night shift.  In September last year, he was asked to work the night shift.  My husband is not a night person.  He is an early morning person.  Sleeping during the day is very difficult for him.  My bed never got made up.  This was very difficult for me!  Prior to my surgery, on the weekends the girls and I would go shopping, go to the park or to the movies so Gary could sleep.  Even little noises would wake him up.  May 2  he begins his new job and although it will involve some travel away from home, it will be a day job.  Prayers are answered!

Transition is happening.  Two days in a row I went to places, beside the doctor.  Gary leaves the night shift.  God is good all the time,  and his mercies never fail.  If you, dear reader are waiting for something to happen, do not despair, God hears your prayer.  I am agreeing with you, that it will happen.  Sometimes the wait is to prepare our heart for the blessing God has for us.  Sometimes we do not know why we wait.  God is faithful.  Do not despair.

And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.  Galatians 6:9  Amplified

I also pray for all the fathers working the night shift.  Today I read a post by a young mother whose husband is working the night shift and she expressed my sentiments exactly.  You can read the post here, http://tumbledweeds.wordpress.com/2011/04/21/holding-pattern/

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 22 Breast Reconstruction


I wore clothes today!  And make-up and earrings.  I went to the grocery store with Gary and visited my neighbors.  This is the first time I have been out,  except to go to the doctor since my surgery.  Getting dressed and wearing make-up cheered me up and I began to really feel there might be an end to this at some point.

My hair has grown out from the chemo to about three inches all over my head.  It is still thin, cottony and grey, but with a little mousse and blow drying I can coax an actual hair style out of it.  Many times I feel silly about being so vain.  It is much easier not to worry about what you look like, when you do not have to put any effort into it.

  You who sit down in the High God’s presence, spend the night in Shaddai’s shadow,
   Say this: “God, you’re my refuge.
      I trust in you and I’m safe!”
   That’s right—he rescues you from hidden traps,
      shields you from deadly hazards.
   His huge outstretched arms protect you—
      under them you’re perfectly safe;
      his arms fend off all harm.
   Fear nothing—not wild wolves in the night,
      not flying arrows in the day,
   Not disease that prowls through the darkness,
      not disaster that erupts at high noon.
   Even though others succumb all around,
      drop like flies right and left,
      no harm will even graze youPsalm 91:1-4

A phone call can change everything.  I received a phone call today,  and my entire flood situation was resolved.  It is much easier to rejoice when the prayer is answered than when you are waiting on the answer.  Focusing on blessings changed my situation and it will change yours.  If you can change your focus from the problem to your blessings, your situation will change.  Many times it takes longer than 24 hours.  I praise the Lord that my situation was resolved in such a short time frame. 

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 21 Breast Reconstruction


I really do not like it when people do not do what they say they will do.  Unmet Expectations.  The fact that I am housebound, full of stitches, itchy and sore, increases the stress of unmet expectations.  I am trying to stay calm and not panic.  The wet floor is still in my bedroom.  Nothing has happened and the  insurance “adjuster” went on vacation, with this message,” I know more about your claim than anyone else, leave me a message and when I get back from vacation, I will get back with you.”  Wonderful!

It could be I am irritable, because of the storm watch.  We have already had hail and rain.  We are still under a tornado watch for another hour. 

It is because of the Lord’s mercy and loving-kindness that we are not consumed, because His tender compassions fail not.

 They are new every morning; great and abundant is Your stability and faithfulness.

The Lord is my portion or share, says my living being, my inner self; therefore will I hope in Him and wait expectantly for Him.  Lamentations 3:23    Amplified

One of my Dad’s favorite songs was “Count your Blessings”.   It is so much easier to focus on unmet expectations, storms, hail, rain and tornadoes; than my blessings.  Gary starts his new job on May 2.  This is something we prayed and believed for, for almost a year.  I have my beautiful Honda Insight hybrid, which we bought in January, right before gas went through the roof.  My Honda Insight hybrid is a double blessing, as it gets that great hybrid gas mileage.  I am healing great, I have had no problems, besides a rash.   The doctor says I am a model patient.  So many people have prayed for me.  I am so blessed to have the prayer and support of so many people.

I encourage you, dear reader, to write down your irritations, problems and unmet expectations and let them go – and begin to count your blessings.  On another piece of paper write down your blessings and focus on those.  An attitude of gratitude is far more productive, than stress and anxiety.  

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 20 Breast Reconstruction


My daughter said tonight that she would be so glad when I was back.  I did not know I went anywhere.  I was sitting in front of her, at the bar in the kitchen.  She said, “You know what I mean, back doing things.” 

Last Friday my daughter and Haruka went to the Big Band Dance at school.  The girls had been invited by two friends of theirs, boys.  It was the first time my daughter had gone to a dance as a couple.  A friend from church took them shopping on Thursday afternoon.  Friday, when my daughter was coming home from school, she burst into tears.  She berated my husband for not “caring”.  I know that she was missing her mommy.  If I had been up to it, I would have taken her to have her nails done on Thursday.  We would have gone  shopping on Tuesday and I would have taken her to have her hair done on Friday.  As it was, she did not get her hair or nails done. She did go shopping. 

It is hard to watch my family function without me.  My husband worked from 9:00 p. m. last night until 11:00 a. m. this morning.  He came home, ate and went to bed by 11:45 a. m.   Fortunately, someone from church picked up the girls at 2:45 p. m. so he was able to sleep until 5:30 p.m.  He got up and took our daughter to swim practice, shopped for groceries while she was swimming, picked her up from swim practice and came home and fixed supper.  This was his second night shift and he just left for work, another 12 to 14 hour shift tonight.  I sit here in my yoga pants and t-shirt and watch all this happen around me.  That is very hard.  I have at least two more weeks.

More than the soreness, the stiffness and the itchiness, is the fact that I am here, but I am not available. 

God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry, our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love.

 We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first.                                                                                                                                                            1 John 4 18-19   The Message

Practicing perfect love, without fear.  I am praying for that.  The next two weeks, I am going to practice everyday – love, without fear.  Love for the insurance company, medical and homeowners.  Love for my family.  Love for myself and love for every person who put themselves in my path.  I will not be afraid about our financial situation, our flood, my family and myself. 

Dear reader, I pray for perfect love for you.  I pray that you will join me in putting  away fear.  What do you fear.  I cherish comments.

I believe every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!!  Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it.  Join me for free and let us see what will happen.  I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of  A Hurricane with your friends.  Subscribe today!  It is free.  It is easy.  You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success.  Your email address will be kept private.  You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search of Symmetry – Day 19 Breast Reconstruction


Some days you cannot put on your happy face, no matter how you try.  Yesterday was one of those days for me.  Although I tried several times to write a post, it came out so dreary and full of whining and self-pity that I coul not publish it.  With all that whine, I certainly needed cheese and crackers.  The next thing up was to become the dreaded “crap magnet”!  https://mommemau2.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/hello-world/

This morning I realized that there were two reasons for my long face, and bad attitude.  The first, is that my son and his family had planned to come from San Antonio this weekend and spend the weekend with us.  As my husband begins his new job on May 2 and his last day at his current employment is this Thursday, he was asked to work all weekend.  My son and his family changed their plans and will be coming two weeks from now.  I was really looking forward to seeing them.  The second reason as the doctor still does not want me to wear clothes, so another Sunday without church.  Casual is one thing, but going to church in only yoga pants and a big t-shirt seems very inappropriate to someone raised in the Church of Christ. 

I have not taken any pain medications in two days.  I really do not like to take medications.  I am not in pain, just sore, itchy and stiff.  This also might have attributed to my bad attitude.

The flood saga continues.  I am not sure how to proceed.  I am praying for supernatural wisdom.  I request your prayers.

God, you’ve done it all!
      Who is quite like you?
   You, who made me stare trouble in the face,
      Turn me around;
   Now let me look life in the face.
      I’ve been to the bottom;
   Bring me up, streaming with honors;   Psalms 71:21 The Message

This is all in the Lord’s plan.  I pray for peace in the storm.  I know that He has not brought me this far to “let me drown” as the old song goes.  I am blessed beyond measure, I am cancer free.  I have two breasts!  I have a husband and family that loves me.  We have insurance, medical and homeowners.  I have a new car!  Well, it was brand new in January.  I have a church family that has helped me with taking the girls back and forth to school, cooked us meals and prayed for us.  I am blessed.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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In Search Of Symmetry – Day 17 Breast Reconstruction.


I led a liturgical dance team for 8 years.  Dancing is my passion.  I collect anything that has to do with dance.  There has not been much opportunity for dancing over the last 2 years.  This morning a friend of mine sent me a poem by a young girl who is dying of cancer.  It is called “Slow Dance.”   Enchanted by the title, I read it with tears running down my face.  The young girl who wrote it requested that the poem be shared.  I am sharing it with you.

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever 
watched 
kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to 
the 
rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a 
butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the 
fading 
night?
You better slow down.

Don’t 
dance so 
fast.
Time is short.
The music 
won’t 
last.

Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear 
the 
reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie 
in your 
bed
With the next hundred chores 
Running through 
your head?
You’d better 
slow down
Don’t dance so 
fast.
Time is 
short.
The music won’t 
last.

Ever told your 
child, 
We’ll do it 
tomorrow?
And in your 
haste,
Not see 
his
sorrow?
Ever lost 
touch,
Let a good 
friendship die 
Cause you 
never had time 
To call 
and say,’Hi’
You’d 
better slow down.

Don’t dance 
so fast.
Time 
is short.
The music won’t 
last..

When you run 
so fast to get somewhere
You 
miss half the fun of getting 
there.
When you worry and hurry 
through your 
day,
It is like an unopened 
gift….
Thrown 
away.
Life is not a 
race.
Do take it 
slower
Hear the 
music
Before the song is 
over.

I think that says it all.  I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.  The young girl asked that her poem be shared with as many people as possible.  Please share with all your friends.

I believe  every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!! Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it. Join me for free and let us see what will happen. I covet your comments and would love for you to subscribe today.

Share From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane with your friends. Subscribe today! It is free. It is easy. You will find out as soon as From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane is updated and never miss out on any seeds of success. Your email address will be kept private. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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