From an Obsessive Optimist in the Eye of A Hurricane.

life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; It's about learning to dance in the rain.

We Wear Our Marriage Inside OUT!

on January 8, 2011

My husband and I wear our marriage inside out. This was not our choice, originally. My dad was a pastor, my husband’s dad was a deacon. I am the oldest of seven children. My dad’s congregation, my husband’s father’s congregation and my siblings found our early marriage fascinating and reported on every facet of it. My husband and I inadvertently triggered this fascination by eloping and having our first child 10 months later. I know those church ladies were counting it down on their fingers!  This Sunday, January 9, 2011 we  will celebrate our 36th anniversary.   

It is true, we are the cliché; everyone said it would never last. 

I was listening to Dave Ramsey yesterday and he said a great marriage is all about perseverance.  Perseverance shows.  My daughter-in-law told me, shortly after she married my son, that she did not want a marriage like our marriage, it was too much work!  I went home and told my husband,   “I believe our seams are showing!”

My husband and I were teenagers in  the seventies, raised in very strict, Christian families.  Like most of our generation, we tried many things and ran from the Lord. We gave everyone plenty to talk about!   It was only when we examined our shattered lives against what we had been taught and knew to be true and came back to the Lord, did we begin to make progress. By the grace of God, and perseverance we stayed married.

We are now happy to wear our marriage inside out. Any peace, joy, prosperity in our life, comes not from us, but from our Lord.

Recently, a niece confided in me, that my husband and I had given her and her husband hope in some tough times, because of the transparency in our marriage, i. e. no one is under any illusion that we have never had problems!

3 Ways To Wear Your Marriage Inside OUT


1.  Do Not Quit.

So let’s not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don’t give up, or quit. Right now, therefore, every time we get the chance, let us work for the benefit of all, starting with the people closest to us.  Galatians 6:9 THE MESSAGE

Meet every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes your way with the knowledge that it  contains the seed of  future success in your marriage. 

2. Set Your Marriage Free From Expectations.

For my part, I am going to boast about nothing but the Cross of our Master, Jesus Christ. Because of that Cross, I have been crucified in relation to the world, set free from the stifling atmosphere of pleasing others and fitting into the little patterns that they dictate.  Galatians 6:10 THE MESSAGE

A dear pastor friend of ours said something so profound that if you can live by it, it will change your life: Expect NOTHING and be grateful for everything.


3.  In Every Situation, Choose Love.

 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love. 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 THE MESSAGE  

 Love is a choice. I know it is a choice, because Jesus made a choice to love me and you. He made His choice in the garden of Gethsemane. His choice to love us caused Him to sweat great drops of blood.

We will continue to wear our marriage inside out, because as someone else has already written, we all married the wrong person!

Remember, every problem, obstacle,dilemma, predicament, quandary, or trouble that comes our way contains the seed of our future success!!  Together, you and I will be able to find that seed of success, water and grow it.  Join me for free and let us see what will happen.

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6 responses to “We Wear Our Marriage Inside OUT!

  1. Honei Macy Bowers says:

    Good advice because it comes straight from the GOOD BOOK!!!!

    Funny how there are no delusions or pretences in our family—at least kids know when they are picking their life partner, that it is going to be work-LOL!!!

  2. Lissa says:

    I always thought it would last! From the time you sneaked into my dorm to tell me about it, leaving poor Gary out in the car, waiting to meet me! Happy anniversary, and many blessing during the coming year.

  3. Melissa says:

    What an amazing post! I’m so happy to have connected with you on here, we are of a similar background and I look forward to more of your marriage wisdom!

    My husband is a pastor’s son, and we were both raised very strict southern Baptist. Enough said. We are loving every minute of our new marriage and look forward to life together.

    I can’t wait to read more of your posts…and you to read mine. I think we’ll have a lot to talk about!


    • mommemau2 says:

      I am so happy for you and your husband. I bless your marriage with a scripture that my husband and I have as our motto, statement.

      Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
      Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
      For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
      Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
      And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

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